@Balham_Life: Gays, Girls & Giggles. The best in camp comedy night in Soho - every Thursday at Shadow Lounge - @QueensOfC http://t.co/KDEPkui2yR

@WandsLS: RT @RitherdonRoad: Save the date! Less than two weeks until the #RRstreetparty #Balham http://t.co/tqTWktforC

@balham_simon: @BlackLaceLegend d'oh!

@DavidUnderdown9: RT @wandsworthnews: Balham nursery looking for pupils from 80 years ago http://t.co/2le3WF8BAQ

@SoundFusionRad: JANINE JOHNSON PRESENTS – SOUL IN THE CITY Friday 19th June 2015 77 Bedford Hill, Balham London - Click For Tickets http://t.co/DFpPc1OrJ9

Balham nursery looking for pupils from 80 years ago - Your Local Guardian


Your Local Guardian

Balham nursery looking for pupils from 80 years ago
Your Local Guardian
A nursery school in Balham celebrating its 80th anniversary is tracing pupils who attended the school when it opened in 1935. Balham Nursery School and Children's Centre, in Endlesham Road, is the oldest of the three state nursery schools in Wandsworth ...

and more »

Steam in Balham

The_Kevster posted a photo:

Steam in Balham

Harry Hill, Tim Vine, Shappi Khorsandi for Balham Comedy Festival 2015 - Digital Spy UK


Digital Spy UK

Harry Hill, Tim Vine, Shappi Khorsandi for Balham Comedy Festival 2015
Digital Spy UK
Harry Hill and Tim Vine will take the stage at Banana Cabaret's 2015 Balham Comedy Festival. The festival, now in its fourth year, will also see the likes of Shappi Khorsandi, Ed Byrne, Paul Daniels and Debbie McGee, and Romesh Ranganathan perform ...

Clapham South crash: Car flips onto side as dramatic collision leaves two ... - Evening Standard


Evening Standard

Clapham South crash: Car flips onto side as dramatic collision leaves two ...
Evening Standard
Emergency services were called shortly after 12.30pm to Balham Hill, near the junction with Nightingale Lane, where police said a female pedestrian had been hit by a car. Pictures from the scene showed the aftermath of a collision which saw the vehicle ...

67026 'Diamond Jubilee', Balham

looper23 posted a photo:

67026 'Diamond Jubilee', Balham

On the 'Discover Folkestone' British Pullman excursion.

67005 'Queen's Messenger', Balham

looper23 posted a photo:

67005 'Queen's Messenger', Balham

On the 'Discover Folkestone' British Pullman excursion. The London bound 377 in the mirror was due out and I think the driver purposely waited until I got my photo. I'll never know for sure.

The Silk Route 15/03/15 - Gypsy Spirit (IMG_5107-E)

The Silk Route posted a photo:

The Silk Route 15/03/15 - Gypsy Spirit (IMG_5107-E)

Saeeda Kasym performing as "Featured Artist" at "The Silk Route" show at the Ballroom at The Bedford, Balham, London 15th March 2015 - "Gypsy Spirit" Theme.

The Silk Route - a cultural evening of dance held on alternate months - see www.SilkRouteShow.com.

Photograph courtesy of www.DaveHalleyPhotography.co.uk (copyright Dave Halley 2015).

The Silk Route 15/03/15 - Gypsy Spirit (IMG_4424-E)

The Silk Route posted a photo:

The Silk Route 15/03/15 - Gypsy Spirit (IMG_4424-E)

Saeeda Kasym performing with her School student troupe at "The Silk Route" show at the Ballroom at The Bedford, Balham, London 15th March 2015 - "Gypsy Spirit" Theme.

The Silk Route - a cultural evening of dance held on alternate months - see www.SilkRouteShow.com.

Photograph courtesy of www.DaveHalleyPhotography.co.uk (copyright Dave Halley 2015).

Major train delays between London Victoria and Balham - Sevenoaks Chronicle


Sevenoaks Chronicle

Major train delays between London Victoria and Balham
Sevenoaks Chronicle
There are currently delays of up to 90 minutes to trains between Balham and London Victoria / Watford Junction. This is caused by electrical supply problems between Wandsworth Common and Clapham Junction. Gatwick Express services are also currently ...
Commuters Stuck On Train In Clapham For 4 HoursLBC 97.3
'Avoid Victoria and London Bridge tonight' passengers warnedLondon24
Major disruption on Southern trains to London VictoriaITV News
Evening Standard -Surrey Mirror
all 180 news articles »

Boutiques, beer and BYOB restaurants: it's the best bits of Balham - Time Out London


Time Out London

Boutiques, beer and BYOB restaurants: it's the best bits of Balham
Time Out London
There's upmarket seasonal produce at Lamberts (Balham High Road), as much roast chicken as you can eat at Poulet Rouge (Chestnut Grove), family-friendly Italian at Bucci's (Balham High Road) or Sunday lunches that will leave you needing a nap at The ...

Dental Practice Shows Children How To Have “Superstar Teeth”

Indigo Little, a new dental practice in Balham, has been taking preventative dental care out of the dentist’s surgery and into local schools in the form of fun, interactive oral health workshops for children.

indigo-little-at-broomwood-school-2

Indigo Little, (formerly Kemp Dental) opened seven months ago. Dr. Kishanie Wijesinghe-Little explains, “We have been warmly welcomed into a great community of people in the Nightingale Triangle. Throughout the handover period, we received a great deal of support from local patients. So we decided to put together a programme to contribute to our local community.”

TACKLING TOOTH DECAY
The workshops come in the wake of NICE recommendations that schools and nurseries should step in and address the worrying trend of tooth decay in children.

Official figures state almost 26,000 children in the UK aged five to nine were hospitalised in 2013-14 due to rotten teeth – nearly 500 each week. And experts warn these shocking statistics are mainly down to poor diet and too many sugary drinks.

“Preventative dental care is at the heart of all treatment at Indigo Little, and this is why we are offering our time and expertise to educate children,” says Kishanie. “Early education about the significance of lifelong dental care could be key to preventing future need for treatment.”

SPECIAL TOOTH-BRUSHING SONG
The practice successfully ran their first workshop at the Nightingale Montessori Nursery School in October. Since then, Kishanie and Indigo Little’s Dental Hygienist Laura Bailey, have visited Broomwood Hall School, and ran a further six workshops in the run up to Christmas.

Children at the workshops learn why visiting the dentist is important. They are shown brushing techniques, and which foods are good and bad. They also get a chance to dress up in masks and gloves, and take turns at playing Dentist.

The closing highlight is a Laura playing guitar and singing her self-penned song, “Superstar Teeth”. This specially written song lasts two minutes – the recommended length of time for brushing teeth. Each child gets to take away a copy of the song on CD to play at home. They also receive a little goody bag full of Indigo Little treats, including stickers, sugar-free sweets, and a guide to good dental care.

The team at Indigo Little hope to continue offering their time and professional knowledge to spread the Good Oral Health message to children. Workshops can range in size from smaller groups up to around 15 children at a time, preferably in age groups 4 to 5, 6 to 7 and 8 to 10-years-old.

indigo-little-custom-moo.com-kids-stickers

If you’d like Indigo Little to visit your school, please email reception@indigolittle.com. For more information about the dental practice, please visit www.indigolittle.com.

The post Dental Practice Shows Children How To Have “Superstar Teeth” appeared first on Balham.com.

Dental Practice Shows Children How To Have “Superstar Teeth”

Indigo Little, a new dental practice in Balham, has been taking preventative dental care out of the dentist’s surgery and into local schools in the form of fun, interactive oral health workshops for children.

indigo-little-at-broomwood-school-2

Indigo Little, (formerly Kemp Dental) opened seven months ago. Dr. Kishanie Wijesinghe-Little explains, “We have been warmly welcomed into a great community of people in the Nightingale Triangle. Throughout the handover period, we received a great deal of support from local patients. So we decided to put together a programme to contribute to our local community.”

TACKLING TOOTH DECAY
The workshops come in the wake of NICE recommendations that schools and nurseries should step in and address the worrying trend of tooth decay in children.

Official figures state almost 26,000 children in the UK aged five to nine were hospitalised in 2013-14 due to rotten teeth – nearly 500 each week. And experts warn these shocking statistics are mainly down to poor diet and too many sugary drinks.

“Preventative dental care is at the heart of all treatment at Indigo Little, and this is why we are offering our time and expertise to educate children,” says Kishanie. “Early education about the significance of lifelong dental care could be key to preventing future need for treatment.”

SPECIAL TOOTH-BRUSHING SONG
The practice successfully ran their first workshop at the Nightingale Montessori Nursery School in October. Since then, Kishanie and Indigo Little’s Dental Hygienist Laura Bailey, have visited Broomwood Hall School, and ran a further six workshops in the run up to Christmas.

Children at the workshops learn why visiting the dentist is important. They are shown brushing techniques, and which foods are good and bad. They also get a chance to dress up in masks and gloves, and take turns at playing Dentist.

The closing highlight is a Laura playing guitar and singing her self-penned song, “Superstar Teeth”. This specially written song lasts two minutes – the recommended length of time for brushing teeth. Each child gets to take away a copy of the song on CD to play at home. They also receive a little goody bag full of Indigo Little treats, including stickers, sugar-free sweets, and a guide to good dental care.

The team at Indigo Little hope to continue offering their time and professional knowledge to spread the Good Oral Health message to children. Workshops can range in size from smaller groups up to around 15 children at a time, preferably in age groups 4 to 5, 6 to 7 and 8 to 10-years-old.

indigo-little-custom-moo.com-kids-stickers

If you’d like Indigo Little to visit your school, please email reception@indigolittle.com. For more information about the dental practice, please visit www.indigolittle.com.

The post Dental Practice Shows Children How To Have “Superstar Teeth” appeared first on Balham.com.

Lots on in Balham for New Year’s Eve!

harrisonsNYE

There’s lots happening in Balham for New Year’s so why not spend the evening locally?

The Bedford is hosting a Banana Cabaret New Year’s Special, with a very special lineup featuring John Moloney, Paul Sinha, Angela Barnes, Adam Bloom and John Fothergill. Tickets £26.50 + 10% online booking fee with wegotickets.com (Concessions £4 refund on door with ID),Doors open 7pm, Show 8.30pm, DJs and dancing til 4am.

Meanwhile at The Grove, it’s a Swinging Sixties New Year’s Eve featuring retro treats, fantastic sing-a-long-sounds and champagne cocktails, with a full dinner service from 7-10pm and festivities until 2am. Pre-order a bottle of champagne to bag a table – call or email to book your spot now!

Or ring in the New Year at The Exhibit – with festivities on all three floors. The Main Bar and First Floor will be playing the regular Exhibit playlist while the Level 3 Bar on the top floor will be playing the very best dancefloor fillers from the 80s & 90s. Tickets are just £15 and are available on The Exhibit’s website. Ticket holders must be in the venue by 10pm, with the party ending at 4am.

For a special guest DJ and drinks promotions all night long, head down to the 3 Monkeys NYE, open from 5pm-2am. Tickets £5 (includes a welcome cocktail on arrival)

Harrison’s New Year’s Eve promises a fantastic night of dinner and dancing. Enjoy a glass of champagne and canapés on arrival followed by a special three course dinner for £80 per person. A DJ and disco in the bar will take you dancing into the early hours.

New Year’s Eve is always a fantastic night at Lamberts and for the 13th time they will be hosting a tasting menu celebration! The evening starts with cocktails & canapes at 8.30pm followed by a 6 course tasting menu with matching wines, culminating wih a glas of Gosset Brut Excellence Champagne and delicious petit fours for the bells.

The post Lots on in Balham for New Year’s Eve! appeared first on Balham.com.

Lots on in Balham for New Year’s Eve!

harrisonsNYE

There’s lots happening in Balham for New Year’s so why not spend the evening locally?

The Bedford is hosting a Banana Cabaret New Year’s Special, with a very special lineup featuring John Moloney, Paul Sinha, Angela Barnes, Adam Bloom and John Fothergill. Tickets £26.50 + 10% online booking fee with wegotickets.com (Concessions £4 refund on door with ID),Doors open 7pm, Show 8.30pm, DJs and dancing til 4am.

Meanwhile at The Grove, it’s a Swinging Sixties New Year’s Eve featuring retro treats, fantastic sing-a-long-sounds and champagne cocktails, with a full dinner service from 7-10pm and festivities until 2am. Pre-order a bottle of champagne to bag a table – call or email to book your spot now!

Or ring in the New Year at The Exhibit – with festivities on all three floors. The Main Bar and First Floor will be playing the regular Exhibit playlist while the Level 3 Bar on the top floor will be playing the very best dancefloor fillers from the 80s & 90s. Tickets are just £15 and are available on The Exhibit’s website. Ticket holders must be in the venue by 10pm, with the party ending at 4am.

For a special guest DJ and drinks promotions all night long, head down to the 3 Monkeys NYE, open from 5pm-2am. Tickets £5 (includes a welcome cocktail on arrival)

Harrison’s New Year’s Eve promises a fantastic night of dinner and dancing. Enjoy a glass of champagne and canapés on arrival followed by a special three course dinner for £80 per person. A DJ and disco in the bar will take you dancing into the early hours.

New Year’s Eve is always a fantastic night at Lamberts and for the 13th time they will be hosting a tasting menu celebration! The evening starts with cocktails & canapes at 8.30pm followed by a 6 course tasting menu with matching wines, culminating wih a glas of Gosset Brut Excellence Champagne and delicious petit fours for the bells.

The post Lots on in Balham for New Year’s Eve! appeared first on Balham.com.

Christmas is coming to Balham!

An afternoon of festive activities will take place on Sunday 30th November in Hildreth Street, from 1pm – 5pm to celebrate the completion of its stunning new makeover and to mark the start of the Christmas season.

The new look Hildreth Street and its businesses will be joined by a wandering Father Christmas and his elves. The afternoon will continue oozing Christmas cheer with community carol singing accompanied by local choirs and the Balham Ukelele Orchestra. Free mulled wine and cider will add to the merriment.

For the first time, Hildreth Street will also have its very own Christmas Tree, a 15’ beauty no less, which will be officially switched on by The Mayor of Wandsworth, Councillor Stuart Thom at 4.30pm. Also not to be missed are the beautiful new Christmas lights adorning Balham’s lamp columns in and around the town centre.

Flower Sanctuary owner, Lisa Carr, said ‘This is a really exciting development for Hildreth Street and will change the area
for the better’.

christmasjpg

The program for the day is as follows:

1pm onwards:
Hildreth Street Businesses In-Store Events & Activities
2pm–3pm
Wandering Father Christmas & His Elves (Featuring The Southside Players & Stagecoach Battersea Theatre)
3pm onwards
Mulled Wine & Music (with the Balham Ukulele Orchestra)
3.30pm onwards
Carols & Community Singing
4.30pm
Lights switch-on by the Mayor of Wandsworth
4.45-5.00pm
Event Finishes

In store promotions include:

-Free balloons at JN Money Transfer
-Warm winter cocktails & cheese fondue at The Lodge
-Boxes of celebrations at Julie’s Nails
-Christmas windows at FARA Charity Shop
-In-store tastings at We Brought Beer
-Robots, candy canes & sweets at E-Computing
-Red carpet with models and face painting at Balham Bou
-’Make your own wreaths’ at The Flower Sanctuary
-Christmas decorations at No. 9 Antiques

The post Christmas is coming to Balham! appeared first on Balham.com.

Christmas is coming to Balham!

An afternoon of festive activities will take place on Sunday 30th November in Hildreth Street, from 1pm – 5pm to celebrate the completion of its stunning new makeover and to mark the start of the Christmas season.

The new look Hildreth Street and its businesses will be joined by a wandering Father Christmas and his elves. The afternoon will continue oozing Christmas cheer with community carol singing accompanied by local choirs and the Balham Ukelele Orchestra. Free mulled wine and cider will add to the merriment.

For the first time, Hildreth Street will also have its very own Christmas Tree, a 15’ beauty no less, which will be officially switched on by The Mayor of Wandsworth, Councillor Stuart Thom at 4.30pm. Also not to be missed are the beautiful new Christmas lights adorning Balham’s lamp columns in and around the town centre.

Flower Sanctuary owner, Lisa Carr, said ‘This is a really exciting development for Hildreth Street and will change the area
for the better’.

christmasjpg

The program for the day is as follows:

1pm onwards:
Hildreth Street Businesses In-Store Events & Activities
2pm–3pm
Wandering Father Christmas & His Elves (Featuring The Southside Players & Stagecoach Battersea Theatre)
3pm onwards
Mulled Wine & Music (with the Balham Ukulele Orchestra)
3.30pm onwards
Carols & Community Singing
4.30pm
Lights switch-on by the Mayor of Wandsworth
4.45-5.00pm
Event Finishes

In store promotions include:

-Free balloons at JN Money Transfer
-Warm winter cocktails & cheese fondue at The Lodge
-Boxes of celebrations at Julie’s Nails
-Christmas windows at FARA Charity Shop
-In-store tastings at We Brought Beer
-Robots, candy canes & sweets at E-Computing
-Red carpet with models and face painting at Balham Bou
-’Make your own wreaths’ at The Flower Sanctuary
-Christmas decorations at No. 9 Antiques

The post Christmas is coming to Balham! appeared first on Balham.com.

November 2014 Balham Town Centre News

Read the November 2014 Balham Town Centre newsletter here: Balham November Newsletter

In this edition: Christmas is coming to Balham!, Small Business Saturday, Reporting Crime, Business Priorities Survey and a Warm Welcome to The Lodge!

The post November 2014 Balham Town Centre News appeared first on Balham.com.

November 2014 Balham Town Centre News

Read the November 2014 Balham Town Centre newsletter here: Balham November Newsletter

In this edition: Christmas is coming to Balham!, Small Business Saturday, Reporting Crime, Business Priorities Survey and a Warm Welcome to The Lodge!

The post November 2014 Balham Town Centre News appeared first on Balham.com.

Independent mindbodysoul combine and refurbish their spas at Balham High Road location

Independent mindbodysoul’s mummy & baby spa is moving!

They’d like to say a huge thank you for the amazing support Balham has shown them at their Ritherdon Road mummy & baby spa over the years and now have some news to share… Both spa locations will be brought together with the mummy & baby spa moved into their Balham High Road site from 3rd December.

Customers will be offered a one-stop hair and beauty experience, and the Balham salon will also be revamped with a new Garden Room for mummy and baby to enjoy!

You’ll still be able to enjoy a massage, facial, waxing and other treatments in the downstairs spa with your tot in tow and can make use of a travel cot in your treatment room, just like at Ritherdon Road.

For those visiting us without little ones, rest assured that the spa will remain the oasis of calm you expect with just the added extras of our new ‘garden room’ upstairs.

imbs

The post Independent mindbodysoul combine and refurbish their spas at Balham High Road location appeared first on Balham.com.

Independent mindbodysoul combine and refurbish their spas at Balham High Road location

Independent mindbodysoul’s mummy & baby spa is moving!

They’d like to say a huge thank you for the amazing support Balham has shown them at their Ritherdon Road mummy & baby spa over the years and now have some news to share… Both spa locations will be brought together with the mummy & baby spa moved into their Balham High Road site from 3rd December.

Customers will be offered a one-stop hair and beauty experience, and the Balham salon will also be revamped with a new Garden Room for mummy and baby to enjoy!

You’ll still be able to enjoy a massage, facial, waxing and other treatments in the downstairs spa with your tot in tow and can make use of a travel cot in your treatment room, just like at Ritherdon Road.

For those visiting us without little ones, rest assured that the spa will remain the oasis of calm you expect with just the added extras of our new ‘garden room’ upstairs.

imbs

The post Independent mindbodysoul combine and refurbish their spas at Balham High Road location appeared first on Balham.com.

Home from the Holidays

Home from Malaysia, after an epic 36 hour flight back on Emirates. KL to Dubai leg was fine. Then we boarded the A380 at Dubai at about 3.00 for the 3.45 leg back to London. At 5.45 they took us all off the plane, having been delayed (1) by customer who had checked in, then never boarded, so they had to find their luggage and take it off the plane (2) then there was a problem with the plane's computer, which they tried in vain to fix, but no joy, so got a new computer, but also didn't work. So eventually they disembarked all of us and we sat around in the airport until about 9pm, after which they said we would be leaving at 7am in the morning and would be taken to hotels. Then we queued 4 times in total for the hotel vouchers, with each counter performing one small task on the hotel voucher. Each queue took about 30  minutes. In the end, I gave up on the last queue (which for the 10 minute bus ride to the hotel), where they were using just 1 10-seater minibus to transport about 200 people, and got some dirham from the airport ATM and took me and the kids to the hotel in a taxi. One good thing about DBX - they have a special woman taxi driver queue for women travellers, which I did feel much reassured about using, compared with having to drive off into the night with a male taxi driver in a strange place that you'd never intended to be in, in the first place. Another queue at the hotel to check in, where I had to throw a wobbly because after queuing for 15 minutes to get to the head of the queue, the guy at checkin promptly went wandering off without a word of explanation. Got to the rooms, the door cards wouldn't work, so had to go back down and get them both reset. Got to bed at midnight, fell on the bed and slept till 4am, then got the kids up and were on the 4.10 bus back to the airport. Entire flight fuelled by Burger King and McDonalds. Moderate throwing up by Sam and me. Very very glad to get back to UK. There were people on that flight coming from NZ, who had already been travelling for 33 hours BEFORE the delay in Dubai. With young children. The horror.

Now busy digitising the whole of my father-in-law's CD collection, which C is gradually transferring over to our house from Wolverhampton. He is in Wolvo today, helping MIL to clear out the house, prior to her putting it up for sale and moving back to Nottingham, after FIL's funeral.

Reading Talleyrand's Memoirs and Little Dorrit. Watching Series 1 of Merlin. Listening to Moby. Planning trip to Galways to see Smiggle and fulfil girls' fantasies of riding ponies along deserted Irish strands.

Driving

Today I said to my daughter that I was instituting a 100% patience policy when on the roads. From now on, people can do absolutely anything - cut me up, undertake me, beep me for slowing down to avoid a cyclist, refuse to give way even when they don't have right of way, go through red lights, stop their car in the middle of the street for 5 minutes so they can chat to their friend, stop on a double red light during rush hour while they pop into a shop and think that they make it OK by putting on their hazard lights, beat the queue by going in the filter lane and then barge in at the top - and not one snarky word will pass my lips.

She snorted in a manner that I can only describe as derisive. And added, "I give you one week tops."

Mouse and university

The Mac is doing that thing where it randomly disables the left click button on the mouse. Then in order to fix it, you have to somehow manoeuvre yourself to mouse settings, using only whatever options are available to you by right-clicking, switch the left/right settings on the mouse, which reactivates the left-click button (but only with right-click functions), and then go back and switch the left/right settings again, back to the normal settings. Can I just say that this never happens on my crappy old Asus netbook that everybody scoffs at because it takes 10 minutes to wake up in the morning.

Well, I 'm back after a titanic struggle involving two different mice and hopeless attempts to execute functions on the Mac using only the keyboard. Why on earth do they make this so difficult? There should always be something that enables you to do most of what you want, using the keyboard alone. If the mouse functions aren't working, how on earth are you supposed to rectify it when the only way you can switch the mouse buttons is by using the mouse? Gah!

Reading that thing in the Guardian all about how Kirstie Allsop is right out of line for daring to suggest that maybe girls should have babies first and then go to university. I can kind of see what she means. I actually think that everyone, male and female, should leave school after A levels and work for five years before they go the university. Apart from people who already have a very clear idea of their vocation and need to train for years to do it, like doctors. For everyone else, if they'd already worked for five years, they would really appreciate university when they get there and have a lot better idea of what they want to do for a living, having been obliged to live in the world for a bit, rather than spending all their time at uni boozing and acting like arseholes. Mind you, tuition fees are probably changing that scenario.

But setting that aside, the problem with Allsop's suggestion is that if girls effectively don't finish uni till they are 30, because they have been off having babies, they are going to be competing with fresh young male graduates and even though an experienced worldly wise young mum is actually going to be more useful and mature than some callow male doofus, our society is set up so that the callow male doofus is the one who will get the job. For Allsop's suggestion to work, society will need to be remodelled so that women who have the baby first and then join the work force and focus on their careers are not disadvantaged relative to the chaps. Maybe that's not easy, but it's a heckuva lot easier to change society (even though it is not easy at all) than to change Mother Nature - and Allsop is quite right, the body clock is ticking and you've got a lot better chance of having a healthy baby and a healthy mum, if she has the baby in her early twenties. I speak as someone who had my kids in my 30s and had the successful career, but my setup only worked because the husband was OK with being the homemaker, while I went out and brought home the bacon.

Anyway, off out to post the direct debit form for St Paul's school fees (argh!) and buy some deodorant. And the house will be safe, because I just had proper locks fitted to all the sash windows by our lovely lovely local locksmiths Oakleys at Southfields. Before today, if you'd been so inclined, you could literally have slid open our ground floor sash windows from the outside, walked in and helped yourself to our precious valuable collection of 5 year old malfunctioning Macs and netbooks and our displays of housedust and half-used pots of Dulux brilliant white gloss.

Saturday

Sofa guy didn't turn up. Does nobody want our sofa? It used to belong to a scion of the Earl of Minto! Are there no raging snobs out there any more? To go by Balzac, I'd do better to be trying to offload it in France, which seems to be full of raging snobs.

Unfriendly girl turned up and took away the Country Lifes. Seemed very standoffish, as if she thought I might have lured her to our house in order to murder her.

Attacked the Virginia creeper in the garden, which is starting to get above itself again.

Kung pao chicken for dinner. Fungus helped with the cooking. I think she's starting to get to be quite a dab hand in the kitchen.

Watched Mean Girls with the grils, which I have never actually watched in its entirety. At last I have found a film that I like Amanda Seyfried in. Then girls went to bed, Welsh Anne came home and we watched the rest of The Rebound with Catherine Zeta Jones, who is just so beautiful. Frankly, Michael Douglas should consider himself privileged to be permitted to service her orally, not go around casting aspersions on her lady parts. Then cracked open the chilled rose and watched The Makeover, with Julia Stiles, who is just lovely. She should actually run for Congress. I would vote for her.

Asked the girls whether they wanted to go and see Richard Armitage at the Old Vic in the Crucible. On the one hand: it's Richard Armitage! On the other hand, I don't want to see something about the Salem witch trials. Ever. Hashtag firstworldproblems.

Sent a protest text to Amnesty re that poor woman in Sudan who's been sentenced to death for apostasy. Two hours later, it was announced that she's being released. I like to think it was my text wot done it.

Passing On

Woke up this morning to an email from my husband, that his father had died in the night. His brother has driven over from Nottingham to be with his mother. He was 80-something and had not been well for a long time - heart condition, diabetes and some sort of cancer also diagnosed earlier on in the year, so I guess it was not unexpected, but still very sad. A blessing though that he went quickly, without suffering or lingering on, at home with his wife of 50 years, entirely lucid and himself right to the end. I guess that is the way most people would prefer to go. The thing that makes me sad, as with my own father, is wishing we could have seen more of him, more recently. It is a great shame that families nowadays live so far apart.

Not much else to report. Anne came up from Somerset for her usual shifts, but apparently the newspaper is getting rid of all its casual staff by June, so she has already started looking for a new job - she seems to have quite a few prospects - and at better newspapers too! She's also thinking a lot about her mother in Merthyr, who is ailing and how they can work it out so she can take care of her at home.

Went up to Clapham Junction to pick up Lol's shoes. Bought the girls steak bakes from Greggs and raspberries from the fruit stall, forgetting there was leftover spag bol for lunch.

Tried to use coupon for discount on Guardian at Tescos self checkout. Failed to work. Eventually the guy had to just give me 60p from the till. Honestly. These coupons are more trouble than they're worth. Since you have to swipe your Tesco card anyway, why don't they just automatically deduct the amounts or credit you with the points without your needing to scan the coupon?

Gave the old kid booster seat away to a tanned old lady on Freecycle.

My Glen Campbell Greatest Hits 2nd-hand CD arrived today. Loaded it up onto the cloud. Galveston! Oh Galveste-on!

Trimmed the lavender border and planted some peas and rocket in a spare bit of the back bed.

Accosted by young chap who seems not all there, while was out walking the dog. Harmless, just kept on repeating questions about the dog.

Spoke to someone at National Power about getting the meter moved. Weird accent from somewhere up north, I think. She was actually really helpful and got it sorted, even though I was pretending to be my own husband, as he is the accountholder. Luckily he has the kind of name that could be either gender and I have the kind of voice that ditto, especially over the phone.

Dhal, okra, mackerel and rice for dinner, ably assisted by my lovely sous-chef Fungus, followed by She's the Man on DVD, which was strangely enjoyable, even though it starred Amanda Bynes, who is now off her head, and Channing Tatum, whom I can never recognise. Dog got a bit uppity at dinner, kept on barking and bouncing herself off my thigh in a bid for titbits, even though Fungus had already given her a bit of mackerel. In the end I got so fed up with her, I shut her out of the living room. So then she went out the back door and re-appeared at the living room window, looking in wistfully.

And so to bed. As Samuel Pepys would say.